Changes

As I impatiently wait for the coming change of seasons, I thought I could at least live vicariously through my blog. Hence the autumnal color scheme. I still have some work to do but I thought I'd go ahead and put it up. What do you think?

Color my world.........Autumn

This weekend, I saw it. It was very sparse and hard to find but, yes, it was there. One single tree in the woods was turning. Its green leaves were skirted with the wonderful light yellow color that heralds the coming of autumn, my most favorite season. I would be in 7th heaven if it were autumn year round. I love the weather as the heat of the day cools off and the evenings start to have that chill bite. I love to wear jeans and sweaters and take long walks in the brisk, clean air, or simply sit on the porch swing and watch the wind blow colors around the yard—golds and oranges from the maples, reds from the sweet gums. I love pumpkin patches filled with orange and yellow corn shocks in the yards. How I long to pile up the leaves and watch the children run crashing through them sending a flurry of colors into the air like golden snowflakes to fall again into our hair. Yes, hurry along autumn—don’t be shy. I’ve missed you.

Submitted to Top Blog Mag for this week's theme of colors.

Just Like Me?

I was talking with my Mom the other day after our recent visit “home”. While there, the children had written their names on Mom’s memo board. She loves it and has promised anyone who erases it a painful death!! But she said she had to look twice at my daughter’s name to decide who had actually written it. Sara, my 7 year old daughter’s handwriting looked just like mine. I hadn’t really realized it but Mom was right. It was almost exactly the way I write—the same curve to the letters, the same spacing and size. This little thing got me thinking about what else my daughter and I have in common and how else have I influenced her.

At times I look at Sara and feel I’m looking into a mirror. It’s a good feeling. She loves music and singing, just like me. Sara is good at math, just like me. She has fair skin and freckles across her nose, just like me. She has stick straight hair, just like me. At other times I see the darker side of me. Sara is impatient and volatile, just like me. She is quick to anger, just like me.

But in many ways Sara is not like me at all. She is shy but still more outgoing than I was as a child. She is reserved at first but makes friends easily. Sara hesitates to try new things but with encouragement, she will participate and in the end excel. I was always a loner but she is a joiner and needs others around her. She loves roller coasters while I’m terrified of them. I see behaviors in her that “I” would like to have. In many ways, she is like me…..but better.

As mothers, it’s our responsibility to model behavior for our daughters, and sons for that matter. I’m pleased to see my positive influence on my daughter. However, it is very difficult to see my negative influences in her. Our goals, then, must be to recognize our opportunities to improve ourselves and to model only positive attributes for our children. In the end, I hope and pray Sara is just like me.

This post was submitted to the Mothers and Daughters Blog Carnival being hosted by Real Life.

Why I Was Late for Work Today

1. I didn’t want to go to work.
2. I hit the snooze button a gazillion times.
3. I didn’t want to go to work.
4. I had to wake Scott up 4 times.
5. HyperDog didn’t want to eat.
6. HyperDog didn’t want to go potty.
7. I didn’t want to go to work.
8. HyperDog decided to eat.
9. Sara spilled milk in the living room.
10. HyperDog NOW needs to go potty.
11. None of the clothes that fit (well, kinda fit) were clean.
12. I didn’t want to go to work.
13. Sara isn’t very good at cleaning up spilled milk.
14. Scott left his sneakers in the garage.
15. HyperDog loves to chew sneakers.
16. HyperDog left Scott’s sneakers in the yard—right next to the sprinkler.
17. Scott wanted to wear his sneakers.
18. Scott’s sneakers were soaked.
19. Scott didn’t want to wear anything else.
20. I REALLY didn’t want to go to work.

As the Stomach Churns

I was awoken from that dream below at 2:30am by a small voice outside my bedroom. “Mommy, I don’t feel well. My tummy hurts”. I got to Scott just in time for him to let loose all over the kitchen floor. Poor thing. He had gotten sick before he got to me but that too thankfully hit the kitchen floor.

I give the little guy credit for climbing down out of the top bunk and making it to the linoleum before puking! I put him back to bed (on the bottom bunk this time—didn’t want to take any chances!!) cleaned up the kitchen and lay on the couch in case he needed me. Poor guy got up again and made it to the bathroom—floor that is but at least it’s not carpet like poor Mel’s mess. Got him back in bed and cleaned up the bathroom when Sara starts called. Please God, not BOTH of them!!! She just needed to use the bathroom, whew!!!!

Scott did well the rest of the night but woke up sweaty and clammy (I suspect he had a fever that broke) with dry heaves. So I’m home with little sick boy today. Seems a tummy bug is going through his daycare class. Sara was NOT happy to have to go to summer camp while brother got to stay home. And of course, he seems fine now. Had fruity Cheerios with no reappearance so far. Oh well, we both needed a rest day. AND I get to catch up on my blogs!!

Dream a Little Dream

I had a dream last night. It was weird. Not as weird as The Farmer’s Wife’s dream but still out there. For some reason, Hubby and I were living in my Grandparents’ house in TN. We had two kids but one was a older boy about 9 or 10 and one was a baby maybe a year old (and they looked nothing like my real children). We were having storms so we had been looking for a safe place. I had found an area under the house that seemed safe but it was small and dark.

We walked out of the house and saw 4 (yes 4!!) tornados coming straight for us!!! I grabbed the kids and told Hubby about the safe place but I didn’t think it would hold all of us. He said to take them to it and he was going to watch the tornados. The kids and I went to the safe place and it was larger than it was before and there was more light.

The next thing I know, it opened up into a full basement, partially finished with a pool table and table tennis. I was surprised having no idea the house had that. I was just beginning to figure out that was where Hubby was “hiding out” when I couldn’t find him when I awoke. I have no idea what that was supposed to mean!!!!!

Two Little Fishes

Both kids started swim lessons mid July. We are a bit behind as they’ve never had lessons before. The first lesson was interesting. Sara started out really apprehensive and Scott was all for it. Half way through the lesson, the tide turned and Sara was doing pretty good but Scott was having nothing to do with it. He had realized he couldn’t touch the bottom and was terrified. Scott never went back but Sara has been doing really well. She’s even been jumping into the pool as long as her head doesn’t go under.

Her last lesson was this past Saturday and her teacher said she is a very strong swimmer and would just take off……if she would only put her face in the water. They even went down the big slide. She was nervous but she did it!! WooHoo!! So Sunday, we all went to the pool. Hubby and I both were amazed!!! Sara was going under when she jumped in and she even would put her head totally under the water to go under the rope!!! Now she WANTS to take more lessons and we are happy to oblige!

Now to get Scott going! After he played with a friend Sunday who could swim and watched Sara having fun on the slide, I think he’s decided that learning to swim is a GOOD thing!! By next summer, we’ll have two little fishes on our hands!

Almost Old

Me: Oh my gosh, I look so old!!
Scott: No you don’t Mommy.
Me: Well, Thank you!!
Scott: You look almost old.
Me: I do?
Scott: Yeah, you have some wrinkles around your eyes and your face is starting to hang down around your mouth……like Mamaw’s.
Me: Like Mamaw’s?!?! Gee thanks!
Scott: But you’re only almost old. Not old yet.
Me: I love you!
Scott: I love you too!

It's a Heat Wave!!

It’s hot. Too hot. Too hot to work. Too hot to play. Too hot to eat. Too hot to sleep. Too hot to breathe.

It’s 102F with a heat index of 114F!! I’m melting!!

Rain only makes it steamier.

Thank God for air conditioning!!

Time to Check the Girls!!

Today is August 1 and it’s time to do your Breast Self Exams (BSEs). Here is a great video demo for BSEs. My doctor uses this method too. He goes back and forth instead of circular making sure to go way down onto the ribcage and all the way up to the collar bone. Don’t forget the underarms!! And look for any odd physical changes: redness, swelling, itching, orange peel skin, heat, a sore that won’t go away. Make sure to call your doctor right away if you see any of these changes!! I admit to not keeping up with it myself even with my previous scares. But lets commit to it now!

Update: Mine is DONE!! Post a comment when your is done, too!!!

Support for Team WhyMommy

We women must stand together and support each other. Many of us are faced with challenges every day. My MIL has battled and beat breast cancer twice. One coworker is currently battling it. Her previous mammogram was fine but she recently found a lump. She had a double mastectomy and radiation and hormone treatments.

I have had my own scares, the most recent one about 6 months ago when I was having swelling and pain in my left breast. My friend experienced the same symptoms just last month. These symptoms are extremely concerning because of a new form of breast cancer. If you haven't heard of Inflammatory Breast Cancer (IBC), you must read this and share it with every woman you can. It doesn't present with lump but rather symptoms of a breast infection so it can be overlooked. My friend and I both were lucky to receive a diagnosis of Fibrocystic Breast Disease. However, we both remain wary.

WhyMommy at Toddler Planet, a young mother with two small babes, wasn't as lucky. Six weeks ago she was diagnosed with IBC. And she is working diligently to spread to word to as many women as she can. This is an extremely aggressive cancer and early detection is paramount. Please read this post on inflammatory breast cancer and share it with everyone you can. Please follow her blog to read more about her story and her family and provide any support you can. Let's spread the word!

8 Random Things About Me

I've been tagged by Laurie at Learning Life Through Unschooling to tell 8 random things about me. I'm not really good at talking about myself individually but I gave it a shot. Here's the Good, the Bad and the Ugly.

1. I play the mountain lap dulcimer. I grew up in the foothills of the Appalachian Mountains where Blue Grass and Folk Music were born. My brother made one by hand when he was in middle school and I loved to play it. My dear Hubby bought me a new one about 10 years ago from an old gentleman craftsman in the mountains. He was an artist! It has the most beautiful tones!! I think I need to get it out and practice some!!!

2. I’m a freak. I have hitchhiker thumbs. You know, the kind that bend way back like they are double-jointed. It’s hereditary. So are free ears where the earlobe hangs down in a little dip and attached ears where the lobe attaches to your face without the dip. My Mom has attached ears. My Dad has free ears. I have one of each. I enjoy weirding people out with my little thumb and ear freak show.

3. I am the Queen of Fluff. I know an insane amount of trivia. If anyone has a question particularly about movies or music, they come to me. They know I’m going to know the answer 95% of the time.

4. I make candles as a hobby. I make them for myself, friends and family. I had considered launching it into a home business until reading about the entrepreneur who lost everything when sued by a customer whose home burnt down after leaving her burning candle unattended……in the bathroom…….UNDER THE TOWELS!!! EEK!!!

5. I love to bird watch. I could sit all day and watch birds at the feeder. We just put our hummingbird feeder up on the back porch so we can see them from the dinner table. It makes for quite exciting dinner conversation.

6. I used to own a cow. Yeppers, a real cow. I grew up on a small farm. My Daddy and PaPaw had several cows that they would breed. We would keep one steer for our own beef and sell the rest at market. My brother loved to name the steer and then torment my friends by asking them how good “Ol’ Tom” or “One Horn” tasted. My brother and I each had a cow and we got sell our calves at market and keep the money (minus expenses). Pretty sweet deal. I was the only kid in Jr High School with a checking account! My cow was black and white. Her name was Blackie. Yes, it was a very original name.

7. I used to raise tobacco. We grew Big Burley tobacco as a cash crop. It was hard work. We would set the plants out in the spring (I’d get out of school to help) and cut it in the summer. Then it hung in the barn to dry until fall when we would strip the leaves and tie it into “hands” or bale it. I really enjoyed this last part. I have never smoked in my life but the sweet scent of tobacco always takes me home.

8. I love to sing. I grew up singing in church—youth and adult choirs, ensembles, solos, you name it. I stopped when I went to college. Last year, I joined a local choral group and sang in a Christmas concert. I had forgotten how much I loved to sing. I’m planning to do it again this year. I can’t wait!!!

Whew!! I'm exhausted!! Now I tag The Farmer's Wife at Running in Wellies and Mama Zen at The Zen of Motherhood if they be so inclined and anyone else who might want to play. Just leave me a comment and a link. :)

A New Day

Thank you for accommodating me through this last week. The series about Misha was very difficult to write but healing in its own way. Guess this last week was the “chance of clouds”. But it’s time to move on. It's a new day and I see the sun on the horizon.

We Miss You Misha

Misha

12/9/1994 - 7/28/2005

Somewhere over the rainbow

Way up high

There's a land that I heard of

Once in a lullaby
Somewhere over the rainbow

Skies are blue

And the dreams that you dare to dream

Really do come true

Some day I'll wish upon a star

And wake up where the clouds are far behind me

Where troubles melt like lemondrops

Away above the chimney tops

That's where you'll find me

Somewhere over the rainbow

Skies are blue

And the dreams that you dare to dream

Really do come true

Remembering Misha--Part 3, When We Get To Heaven

We moved to our new home June 20, 2005. It’s very hectic moving 2 kidlets and a dog in the heat of summer. The kids missed the old house and were having trouble adjusting to the new daycare. It was a very stressful first week. Misha seemed to be adjusting fine until that first Friday.

We got home that night and sound she could hardly walk. She was unsteady on her feet like she was dizzy and her ears were all crusty like an ear infection. She wouldn’t eat or drink. The next morning she was no better so I took her to the vet. They ran some tests and cleaned her ears out good. The tests showed elevated liver enzymes but not much else. She said Misha reacted like she’d been poisoned. That didn’t make any sense. We’d been there only a week and she was always on leash and rarely made any noise so I could see no reason for anyone to harm her. They gave us some meds for a possible ear infection and sent us home.

Several days passed with still no improvement so we tried another doctor. He was an angel. He kept her for almost a week doing tests and giving her IV fluids. He called for us to bring her home saying she had improved nearly 100% over how she came in but the Misha we took home that day was not our Misha. And her blood work still showed there was something going on.

Dear Hubby took her for an U/S. He said the doctors were all chatty and pleasant as they started but the more they looked the quieter the room got. It was cancer and it was widespread. I think the stress of the move accelerated her condition. We took her home with some high protein food to help boost her energy and a hope for a few more months. That was July 14, 2005.

She was too weak to climb the stairs so we would carry her into and out of the house. We kept her with us as much as possible. She had good days where the old Misha was back and bad days. We tried to prepare the children telling them that Misha was very sick and we needed to spend time with her. She was failing quickly.

The night came when Misha could hardly breathe and she couldn’t walk. She couldn’t keep even water down. We called the vet who told us to give her some Benadryl to make her comfortable through the night. We woke Sara up so she could say goodbye. She cried so hard when we told her that Misha was very sick and it was time for her to go to heaven. She wanted to know how Misha would get there. I told her an angel was coming to carry her there and that once she got to heaven, she wouldn’t be sick anymore. She would run and play and be God’s dog. She would be able to watch us and would be waiting for us when we get to heaven.

The next morning the children and I said one last goodbye and Dear Hubby took her to the vet. He wouldn’t let me come. I was very angry with him that day because I wanted to be there. But now I understand this was something he had to do himself. He is a very private person and needed to grieve in his own way….alone. It was time. She would not have lived another day. I still, to this day, feel we let her down…..that we let her suffer trying to keep her with us for “just one for day”. Dear Hubby was with her when she passed. He said he held her and she just went to sleep……and then he cried. I locked myself in my office……and then I cried. That was July 28, 2005.

It’s been 2 years now. I still have her collar and tags in my dresser. Sara has a picture of her on her dresser and still cries for her at times. Scott was too young to really understand but he misses her just the same and has a fond attachment to anything Husky. I think of her often. I miss how she knew when we turned off the TV, it was time to go to bed. I miss “talking” with her. I miss her “cuddling” with me, lying between my legs and the couch. I even miss her begging to lick the ice cream bowl. But I know that God now has a great friend. I see her lying between His legs and His throne, cuddling. I see her playing with our friend Nancy who passed later that year and sitting with my FIL who passed last year. And I know that she’ll be waiting for us when we get to heaven when we’ll all be a family again.

We love you Misha.

Remembering Misha--Part 2, Dog Days

Misha came to live with us in January 1995 just after our 1st anniversary. She was such an adorable little puppy. And SOOOO smart!! Her crate was too big so we shortened it up with a board to keep her from messing it in. That little stinker figured out she could go over the board to mess and then scramble back to the front so we never knew. She got several days of praise for staying clean until the telltale odor gave her away! She also made a mess on the rug at the garage door. We didn’t realize this either until we noticed the rug was missing. I found it in the laundry room. She had actually messed on the rug and pushed it under, yes, that’s right UNDER the door into the laundry room!!! That was when we realized who was going to run the household!!!

And rule she did. In our house, Hubby was Alpha, Misha was Beta and I was at the very bottom of the pack. She slept in our room on our double bed with us. Actually, Hubby is 6’3” so he took at least half the bed. Misha slept at the bottom of the bed on my side and I got whatever was left. She got to lick the ice cream bowls, pudding cups and yogurt cups clean and leftover soup, sauce and gravy went into her bowl. She was a real talker too. At times I could almost swear she was saying words. She “talked” with such tone and inflection you always knew what she was trying to say.

She loved being outside watching the birds, chasing squirrels and just running!! Huskies LOVE to run! It’s innate!! They can’t help themselves!!! It was great when we moved to North Carolina and had a small fenced back yard that she could play in. We had a hard time getting her to come back inside most days!

She had the best life but that did change some in late 2000. That’s when the kidlets started to join the family. And let’s face it kids change everything. Misha was no longer the center of attention. I had two little ones a year and a half apart and Hubby was working or on-call most of the time. She wasn’t loved any less, however, spreading the time out was difficult and she was getting less attention. She was also getting older and starting to have health problems.

The time came for us to find a new home. Hubby had been commuting about 3hrs each day for over 6 years and we decided enough was enough. It took us over a year but we finally found the perfect house. It was in a rural area on 1.5 acres and it had an invisible fence so Misha would be able to run to her heart’s content!!!! She could chase squirrels and run with the kids all day! It was going to be perfect!!! ……was going to be……..

Remembering Misha--Part 1, Welcome to the Family

Comments Anyone?

Jeana over at Days To Come has posed the question, “What is the purpose of Comments”.

Realistically, when we open our blogs to comments, we are inviting everyone who reads to say anything they want about us. This can be very difficult to do. I mean, most of us bloggers are posting about ourselves, our lives, our families, our convictions, dreams, acccomplishments, fears. It can be hard to hear someone disagree with us. A negative comment can be a slap in the face. Thankfully, from my experience with my blog and others, the negative comments don’t happen very often. And honestly, I welcome a different perspective as long as it is presented with a degree of civility.

I think the other reason we take comments is to get that pat on the back. I admit that I get excited when someone leaves a comment. I secretly envy those blogs whose posts get 10 or 20 comments. That means that people are really connecting with them. It shows that they are great authors who make people laugh, or cry or think. A comment is a Kudo, a round of applause, a head nod. Let’s face it, we all want to have our Sally Field moment, “You like me…..You REALLY like me!!!!!”

So I’m gonna keep writing and reading comments. Hopefully, I learn a bit about my audience to continually improve my writing and some day I’ll have my OWN Sally Field moment!

Bow to the Queen!!!

Ring Ring!!

Me: Hello.
Hubby: I got a trivia question.
Me: OK.
Hubby: Who played “Brad” in Rocky Horror Picture Show”?
Me: Barry Bostwick.
Hubby: Thanks! That’s all I needed!
Me: Glad to be of service.

Oh, yes…......I AM the Queen of Fluff!!!!

Remembering Misha--Part 1, Welcome to the Family

Hubby and I married in January 1994 then Hubby relocated to be with me in the Far North Chicagoland. We were in our very first house and had met two wonderful couples just down the street— The U’s and The C’s. It was great! They were wonderful friends. The U’s had a female Siberian Husky named Alexis. She was so sweet. She was enamored with Hubby and would actually position herself between him and me. It was too funny!! The C’s had a male Siberian Husky named Nikita (Nikki). He was HUGE and could place his front paws on Mr. C’s shoulders (Mr. C is about 6ft 6in!!!). He looked quite intimidating but he was just a big push over!

Well, Alexis and Nikki got twitterpated and on December 9, 1994, Alexis gave birth. Six pups. She was a smaller dog and had trouble whelping them so she ended up with a C-section. She was very weak and the U’s almost lost her so the pups had to come home that night while Alexis stayed in the hospital to recover. We all got to hold the just born pups and help feed them with tiny little bottles. It was amazing!

They were adorable. Alexis Jr. (AJ) looked just like her mother. Brutus was the biggest pup of the six. Piggy had two little black dots on her nose that looked like a pig nose. Dakota had two black dots on his belly and was picked that first day to be The C’s pup. George was named after a Bugs Bunny cartoon. You know the one. “I’ll hug him and squeeze him and call him George.”

They were all black and white except for the last one…..Silver. She had the most beautiful silver/grey fur. You could always pick her out of the pup pile!! She was beautiful and different and …………and she was slowly winning our hearts.

Every time we went to visit, Silver ended up in our laps. Mr. U was always making a fishing motion when we held her--like he was reeling us in. We kept telling them we just weren’t ready for a pet. It’s too much responsibility. But still, she kept ending up in our laps and Mr. U kept making that reeling motion.

We all got together just before Christmas to celebrate the holiday with our friends—our family, really, since ours were 800 miles away. Once again, Silver was in our laps. I looked at Hubby and said, “Can we name her Misha??” And Mr. U was in the corner, frantically reeling………hook……line…….and sinker.

I'm gonna call him Shadow....

Scott got a new pet yesterday. Well, sort of. Sara picked up a snail shell at daycare and Scott just had to have it.

I want the snail!
No, it's mine!
But you have a calapitter!!!!
No I don't!!!
Yes you do! It's a cocoon!!
No, I don't, it died! It never hatched!!! (oops, sorry I never updated you on that!)
But I want the snail!!!
Fine! Take it!
Thank you.

So he did. And he put it in a sippy cup with a lid just like Sara's calapitter. I kept telling him it was empty but he said he still wanted to keep it. He even put leaves in the cup. And he named it Shadow. (He wanted to name Hyperdog Shadow but we didn't feel it fit her. He was VERY disappointed.)

When Daddy put him to bed last night, they were looking at it.

Wow, that's neat.
It's name's Shadow.
Are all those leaves for it to eat?
No, it's dead. The leaves are it's bed.

Shadow currently resides next to his bed so he can look at him. Kids!